The Unchanging Truth

Can we really know someone? It feels like everyone isn’t who they really are. They try to be something their not, just to get attention from others. When someone is really close to someone, do they really know each other? Or do they just really know who the other person pretends to be? I don’t think I really know anybody. I don’t even know if I know myself. I change all the time. My change just comes. Even when I don’t want to change, I do. It’s as if my feelings are me. And my feelings always change!  It’s crazy. I am sure that has something to do with being a teenage girl =). But I don’t think that’s fair! I want to have a stable feeling. I want to choose between chocolate or vanilla. I don’t want to change my favorites with how I feel… But I do. Naturally, I always do. So if my feelings are always changing, then everyone elses feelings must be changing too. So who or what can I cling to that will give me stability?

I am begining to think I have no unchanging truth to hold on to. So I opened up my bible, hoping to find an answer or someway to discover how to ground myself in something that won’t alter. This is what I found: “Do not be deceived, my beloved brethren. Every good endowment and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change”. (James 1:16-18)

Something became clear to me after I read this passage. Every good thing is from God and God is unchanging. Maybe I feel like there is nothing stable in my life because I am not clinging to the good things. And that’s probably because  sin’s attraction is more upfront then the attraction of goodness. But the beautiful thing is that God has placed people in my life who are good. I want to acknowledge their wrong, but I want to never cease to see their good. After all, wouldn’t I then know someone for who they truly are?

country or city? …Does it matter?

This past week I spent in Nashville, Tennessee. My sister, Tina, is working as a FOCUS missionary at Vanderbilt University and my other sister, Marie, is down there pursuing her musical career. It was great to witness the difference between these two lives! Actually I thought it would help me make my decision for what I should do with my life next year. I only have a year of high school left and I am trying to decide which road to take. Music or school? I really can’t choice. I would love to take a year and just work solely on music. But then there’s that glamour of college life. College. Getting away. Leaving! I’ve lived in the small, country town of Front Royal since I can remember. Why wouldn’t I want to leave? When I was in Nashville it was like a breath of fresh air. I got to take in “the life I don’t have”. Nashville is amazing. My sister’s apartment is right next to everything! It was great getting to wake up to Starbucks right outside the front door. Here in Front Royal it takes about 45 mins to get to our nearest mall, which doesn’t even include a Macy’s. Cold Stone, my favorite place in the whole wide world, is also about a 45 min drive. Don’t get me wrong, there are things I love about the country. But what if I was really made to be a city girl? ….Am I not living the life I was made for? Was I made to wear a flannel or a blouse? haha, does it even matter? What does matter? This past week I figured it out: relationships. It’s in relationships that I discover the power of love. And in love, I discover the power of what I was made to do, and the power of what I was made to receive. I always want to leave home and “start my life”. But my life was made so that I can love and be loved. I can do that anywhere! A relationship with God can be achieved anywhere. Relationships are ready to be unfolded in every small town and in every large city.

So being home isn’t as unattractive as it used to be. In fact, it’s the one place I want to be right now. Now that I know how cool it is to be in relationships, I see that my home is where I have some really strong relationships. The relationship I absolutely love is the relationship between me and my sister, Megan, who is also my god-daugher. How cool is that? My Mom told me that when she told Megan that Teesa (that’s what Megan calls me!) was coming home, Megan blew a kiss. That totally made my day. I am so happy that I get to see Megan grow up. In those times, when I want to leave home and experience freedom, Megan always shows me what life’s about…love. Love is amazing!  It is easy to experience too! It all starts with relationships.

An Evening with Mat Kearny, a Lesson in Leisure.

Last night I went and saw Mat Kearny at the Cannery Ballroom in Nashville, TN and had a great time. The night began with the usual line waiting experience, and most of my fellow waiters were young women, first daters, and more established couples. There were also a number of star attendees including Taylor Swift and American Idol finalist David Archaleta.  The ratio of women to men was acute but did not surprise me due to Mat’s heart felt love songs and pop/rock tendency. I was not weathered in Mat’s music, but I knew the hits. We slowly walked up the steps and into the venue which was (as always in Nashville) hip in a semi grunge way. As we approached the stage, I was impressed by four strings of light bulbs that hung from the ceiling to the stage floor in a Christmas light fashion.

 

The show began. The opening act Diane Birch (www.dianebirch.com) was great! She played piano and sang similar to Carol King and had a bit of Stevie Nicks in her too. Her band consisted of drums, electric guitar, base, and trumpet. The harmonies were strong against her groove based songs, and the audience swayed in place for her. She seemed to sing mostly of love, and she didn’t really say much between songs.

 

Mat Kearny began his set and was welcomed with screams from the female population. He sang and played his songs just like the album and the steady power chords over mid tempo love songs produced “the last song of a movie” feel. What I liked most about Mat Kearny is he seemed like someone you would know and be friends with. By the end of the show, I wouldn’t say that I loved his music but that I was impressed by the crowd that he drew. Many people had beers in their hand, but no one seemed intoxicated. There was a general sense of friendliness in the whole room. It was a nice change, because so much of concert going ends with rude fans and drunken parking lot scenes. This is due to a huge misconception of a “good time”. His music and personality didn’t encourage “lets get crazy” behavior, and everyone thoroughly enjoyed themselves. For me, it was a great example of real leisure. Thanks Mat!

 

The crowd!

My sister Tina and me at the concert!

New camera and new pictures

My dad just bought a new camera. We’ve been having fun with it! Check out some photos.

 

Marie performed at an event at  Rappahannock Cellars Winery that was held in the barn! She played with a jazz trio. It was really nice! But anywho, there was a couple who had brought their dogs and they asked Marie if their puppies could have a turn on the mike! 

This is the Mark Brandt Trio. Marie had a great time performing with them. You can check out their music at www.markbrandtrio.com

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Seasonal love

Each time a new season comes around, I take a breath of fresh air. I could definitely be classified into the group of people who when asked what their favorite season is answer, “I don’t really have one. I love each one of them”. There’s something so exciting in a seasonal transition. It’s so refreshing. Take for example, a long winter. After being cold for so long (although that too has it’s benefits) there’s nothing I enjoy more then tasting the warmth of spring. Currently, I am living inside the mere splendor of the beauty that fall has to offer. Yesterday afternoon Carol Lynn walked in the kitchen (where I was enjoying a delectable piece of banana bread) and explained, “going on runs  in the fall is just so amazing! I almost don’t think about the pain. All I can concentrate on is the colors. I love the browns. I love the greens. I love the falling of the leaves”. It was really nice to witness! Haha, Carol Lynn runs all the time and never have I seen her soak up the beauty of nature so much that it was evident in her face. I was jealous! She had gotten a taste of God’s love and I wanted to experience it too!

So now do you think I’ll start running? Haha, no way. I plan to enjoy the outdoors in different ways. I actually love love love rivers! I am so blessed to live near the Shenandoah River. This river is beautiful throughout the whole year. It’s beauty is unchanging,  just like God’s love. I like to think about that. Although the seasons bring about new looks and new feelings, God is portraying his great love for us in each one. We can so easily find Him by just walking out our front door. For He is alive in the summer sun. He is alive in the fall colors. He is alive in the winter snows. He is alive in the blossoms of spring. Let’s discover Him.